


Some Questions are Better Left Unanswered

by Cygna



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Norse Religion & Lore, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Angst, Bad Clint Barton, Implied/Referenced Sexual Assault, Natasha Romanov Is a Good Bro, Past Rape/Non-con, Protective Thor (Marvel), Sibling Love, Trauma, not explicit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-04
Updated: 2020-08-04
Packaged: 2021-03-06 07:53:42
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,282
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25699864
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cygna/pseuds/Cygna
Summary: Clint asks a question he shouldn't have.Loki has alot of Trauma from the past and Thor is a protective bro."My brother is not a freak, he is a survivor. He is not weak or sensitive to teasing, he is the strongest person I know."
Kudos: 53





	Some Questions are Better Left Unanswered

**Author's Note:**

> !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
> TW: implied/referenced past rape!  
> !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
> 
> Disclaimer: I don't own characters or Universe
> 
> I really wanted to write an Avengers reaction to the Svadilfari situation but focused on Loki and Thor's reaction to someone sticking their foot in their mouth. I kept imagining a super protective Thor that will never find this situation funny defending his brother even when he's not there. 
> 
> Firstly all Sexual Assault Survivors are strong and valid people, and I hope this fic does not belittle them in any way.
> 
> Also I didn't use the actual word rape in the entire fic because the characters in my mind couldn't bear to use that word. I didn't do it to invalidate the fact that Loki was raped or to cover up that is what happened by talking around it. Just the characterizations of the characters I had still were not ok with that word.
> 
> This is a angsty fic with no real happy resolution but I just couldn't get it out of my head. I'm a little nervous to post this just based on content but it kind of wrote itself.
> 
> read the end note for one last disclaimer and updates on other writing
> 
> read with caution for your own triggers please

Loki glances around at his brother’s new friends as they all celebrate after successful mission. He suspects he was invited along only because of Thor, but the Avengers are slowly becoming more accustom to his presence and the hostile glares have reduced by half since he first came. The heroes were not initially so happy with the sentence he had received from Asgard reluctant to trust him after the whole New York debacle. The archer had muttered something under his breath about never hearing of murderers getting community service. However once Thor had explained how Odin had bound his seidr so he could no longer wield it with harmful intent towards innocents or the team barring self defense they were more willing to listen. And after Thor’s explanation of how the healers had found evidence of mental tampering and torture, they were almost welcoming. They still were wary around him but seemed to accept his presence around the tower. They were nowhere near friendly however as Loki preferred to stay only in his brother’s company or alone, but somehow he found himself being dragged along to this post mission celebration dinner of pizza and alcohol. Honestly this was familiar to Loki as it was not dissimilar to what Thor and the Warriors Four used to get up to after battles or campaigns won. He knew he just had to wait a little while until his brother was suitably distracted by drink and company then he could slip away to his room. He had done it many times before and was well practiced in this maneuver.

Standing at the edge of the room and paying only half attention to the conversation between Thor, the archer, and Stark, he was thinking through a potential new spell to hide his presence from Thor for a few hours. For some reason the blonde warrior had annoying habit of popping up whenever Loki was finally starting to gain some peace in his meditations. Because he was caught up in his own mind, he only noticed Stark trying to gain his attention after the third time when he yelled,

“Hey Reindeer Games,” loud enough for the whole room to fall silent and turn towards him an Stark, “tell us if it’s true, your brother keeps denying it, but did he really dress up as a girl and almost get married to some giant chick.”

“ Brother please tell them how I only did it to get back Mjolnir.” Thor pleads but doesn’t look too upset, so Loki just smirks back eager to embarrass his brother.

“Oh most definitely, that was the reason, but the only reason you succeeded was because I helped convince them you were a maid. They were deeply suspicious because you couldn’t curb you appetite for one day.”

The rest of the Avengers laughed as Thor blushed and muttered under his breath.

“Nice Loki,” Stark said with a smile, “ We finally have someone to fact check all the ridiculous stories Thor tells when we ask him about some legend. They always acts like he is some grand hero in these things and he just adds to them with more details to make himself sound better.”

Loki laughs walks closer to them, “ Yes that is not unusual behavior from my brother.” He is finally standing next to Thor and asks, “What else has this buffoon told you.”

“He said he once got out of another marriage by talking someone to death,” the Widow pipes in.

“Ah that is true to an extent, he got them to keep talking until the sun turned the dwarf to stone.” Loki says with a smile thinking of the one time his brother took his advice to think with his head not his hammer.

“ Do you guys have another brother named Baldr that you killed,” the archer asks with a vindictive smirk aiming to throw Loki off.

Thor and Loki both burst out laughing.

“No he is our cousin that got mad when I bested him in a tournament, so he and his brother made up that dramatic story.” Loki says while finally starting to relax. He did not know conversation with these people could actually be fun.

“In reality,” Thor picks up the tale, “ he tripped over his own spear which was ironically made of mistletoe, and almost took out his own eye while trying to dodge Loki’s quick attacks.”

The brothers look at each other fondly remembering the grand time they had after celebrating Loki’s victory. His father was actually proud of him that day he recalls, and the people of Asgard were lauding their second prince for days after.

Barton was still holding a grudge Loki knew, but so far he had only been passive aggressive and petty, no outright attacks. So Loki could see on his face his disappointment in their nonchalance. Barton was apparently trying to find a sore spot, but had failed. Loki looked away from him towards the rest of the Avengers who had been drawn in and were listening intently as Thor told one other tale. Apparently they were all pretty curious about their lives before Thor was banished. In his observation of the others he failed to see Barton’s disappointment turn to anger and then determination, and was unprepared for him to interrupt Thor and say,

“So is it true you’re brother fucked a horse.” And while his question was aimed at Thor, his gaze never left Loki’s face.

The room fell silent at that glancing awkwardly between Loki, Thor, and Barton. Stark tried to break the tension chuckling nervously saying

“I’m sure that’s just another exaggeration Clint, you heard how…”

but Loki can’t focus on what he’s saying anymore it’s like the whole world has fallen away and he can only hear how his heart has started to pound faster in his chest and sense how his breathing is starting to grow shallow. He needs to get out of there he needs to leave. In his panic he misses Thor’s pained glance towards him but comes back to himself as Thor puts a heavy had on his shoulder attempting to be reassuring and says deadly serious.

“You know not of what you speak.”

Loki feels Thor take a breath about to say something else but Loki’s panic breaks through first. The hand Thor placed trying to comfort him feels like a restraint, and Loki cannot bear to be touched at the moment. He shoves of Thor’s hand and wants to say something, but does not trust his voice not to shake and know he has to leave before his knees start to shake and fail to hold his weight. Already his hands are shaking so he turns abruptly and leaves the room at almost a run and locks himself in his bathroom. He looks at himself in the mirror and slowly sinks to the floor leaning against the wall. He looks deathly pale and is sweating uncontrollably. The memories he fought so hard to keep at bay surge back in full force. He remembers the task his father set him to prove he was grown when he was not even the human equivalent of fifteen. He remembers how clever he felt when he thought of the plan. How invincible he felt and how naïve he truly was. He remembers the unbearable pain and panic when he realized what was about to happen. He remembers the shame after, and the utter devastation he felt when he couldn’t change back to his human form and realized what that meant. He remembers the surprising joy and love he felt after seeing his son for the first time, and how all the hate he had felt for Sleipnir before he was born vanished after he beheld him. The blameless infant that was not at fault for his conception. How strong his love for his son was, and still is. He remembers the anger after Odin found them both and took Sleipner and forbade anyone from speaking of the incident. He remembers Thor holding him in his grief as he sobbed himself to sleep the first night he slept away from Sleipnir after Odin had taken him to the stables. He remembers all of this and cries. He can’t seem to stop so he just stays there knowing no one except maybe Thor will look for him, and even Thor will probably be delayed by those oafs downstairs. He curses Barton silently in his mind, the archer was looking for a sore spot and hit the most painful one of all by accident.

Thor watches his brother leave the room and closes his eyes and takes a long breath before attempting to follow after him knowing the fallout of Barton’s remark will not be easy. As calmly as Loki walked out Thor knows his brother would have broken the first moment he was sure of his privacy. A hand on his wrist stops him, Steve, he realizes

“Wait you can’t just leave like that what is going on.”

Thor looks around the room, Bruce and Stark look uneasy as they seem to have realized this is somewhat serious, Steve just looks confused, Barton looks pleased as if he finally one a point, and it makes his blood begin to boil, and Natasha looks at him shrewdly and says,

“ He couldn’t stand you touching him.”

Her head gesturing towards the direction Loki left. Her face grows knowing and apologetic as Thor nods at her.

“I need to find him he says,” and attempts to leave again.

“Wait hold up what is going on,” Stark says in confusion now glancing between Natasha and Thor.

“Its obvious,” Clint says with a smirk. “He can’t handle us knowing he’s a freak. He’s too sensitive to teasing.”

Natasha looks askance at Clint and says furiously, “Clint, Shut up.”

“Why if he can’t handle a bit of teasing he should leave. He can’t keep up his perfect act all the time. Now we all know how fucked up he is. Seems like you guys were all forgetting” Barton says with a self satisfied air.

Thor looks at him with barely restrained anger and says in a voice that could cut glass.

“And I thought you Midgardians were supposed to be better about not blaming victims in this type of situation and having respect for their trauma.”

Clint is beginning to look slightly uneasy, while Tony and Bruce look horrified as they seem to have finally understood Natasha and the brothers reactions. Steve is still looking confused while Natasha looks as if she is about to shoot Clint.

But now Thor cannot stop, “My brother is not a freak, he is a survivor. He is not weak or sensitive to teasing, he is the strongest person I know. How many others do you know that at the Midgardian equivalent of fourteen could have withstood the trauma he did and still love his son without hesitance. Who survived all this alone and further yet survived my father’s cruel separation after he found them. Who survived unending mockery from the court but never said a word in response or in his own defense lest his son believe he did not want him. I will say this again only once Clint Barton. You know not of which you speak so cease or I will make you.”

With that he strides away in search of his brother leaving a room from of stunned Avengers behind him.

“You’re an idiot.” Natasha snarls at Clint. “You’ve been gunning for him since he got here and now you got him are you happy.”

Clint looks up at her shakily, “I didn’t know… I wouldn’t have if I had kn… I didn’t know.”

“Well too fucking late Barton, You couldn’t leave it alone could you.” She snarls and turns away.

Steve finally asks, “So he had a kid that his father took?”

Bruce looks at him tiredly and says “He had a kid when he was fourteen and I’m assuming it was not by his own choice, and on top of that his father took his son from him the only good thing he had from that time. I’m surprised he didn’t deck Clint for his jab.”

Tony continues for him after he had hastily been typing on his Stark Pad, “Yeah according to mythology he got trapped in horse form because he got pregnant and the baby had eight legs. Also the horse is now Odin’s war steed.” Steve looks mildly disturbed at that.

“Reading between the lines you can see it was definitely not consensual, and from Thor we know it happened when Loki was still a kid. Of course he still holds trauma from that, I really thought Thor was going to hit you Clint, and honestly after reading this I might do it for him” Tony finishes with a glare.

“Well I think this party is really over now” Natasha finally says after a long silence after Tony’s last comment, and they all disperse. Steve, Bruce, and Tony look both sorrowful and angry after all the revelations, and Clint looks like he is about to throw up. Natasha has no sympathy for him and leaves instead to go secretly check on the brothers.

She arrives at their floor and hears Thor speaking quietly from Loki’s room. She gets there in time to see Thor’s relief as the bathroom door that he’s been sitting next to finally open and sees him go inside and hold crying Loki and start to murmur quietly in his ear as Loki starts to slowly calm down. She leaves them both to give them privacy and knowing Loki is in good hands for now.

**Author's Note:**

> Additionally in this fic I know Thor implies Loki is stronger for loving a child that was a result of rape. This was not meant to be a blanket statement only how Thor would view the situation.   
> No matter how someone reacts to rape or discovering they are pregnant from an unwanted sexual encounter they are strong and their reactions are valid. All the actions they may take in response are valid, and require strength. Keeping a child is not always the best option for the person pregnant or the child in question and people need to respect that. And my apologies if this fic made you feel as if your decisions were not valid in anyway.
> 
> Writing Updates:  
> A Wolf and his Cub will hopefully be updated by the end of this week


End file.
